Confusing Diagnosis
by Tarantallegra13
Summary: Post-Breaking Dawn. Things get a little hectic in the Cullen household after a visit to a therapist leaves the girls with personalities different from their own...hilarity abounds! All couples featured. R&R A/J,R/Em, E/B, J/R, C/E Canon
1. Chapter 1

AN: Hello Readers. Welcome to my new story! It is set post Breaking Dawn. It doesn't really matter where they live for the purposes of this. Please read…it will pick up after the first chapter and I love reviews. They make this whole process so much more worth it. Thanks for reading and I hope you really enjoy it!

Chapter One – Bickering

Carlisle POV

I was sitting in my office after a long day of work and wishing that I could block all the sound coming from the house. I could hear Alice laughing at Jacob as Rose teased him. Nessie was attempting to fight back with her own words but Emmett was keeping her off of him. Jasper sat in the corner, enjoying the waves of emotions through the room and trying to calm the group but failing miserably. Edward and Bella were attempting to get Nessie under control and failing as well. Esme had walked in on the room but left quickly, preferring the solace of her garden out back.

I sat at my desk and wondered what on Earth was wrong with our family. We had dealt with the Volturi twice, full blown vampire wars, and a group of shape shifting wolves, but we couldn't deal with normal human problems. You would think that we might be able to gain patience but apparently it takes more than the century most of us have been alive to gain that.

I didn't know who to turn to. I mean I could hardly take us all to a human psychologist. Emmett would let it slip within 5 minutes that Jake was a werewolf and Jake would spill about being vampires. I couldn't imagine the scandal that would cause. Admittedly, the shrink might not believe us but we would probably still end up moving to Japan in the end.

Then it hit me, Tanya, she must have problems with her coven too from time to time, she must have some solution to my situation. I could give her a call I guess. The kids wouldn't be listening since they were busy arguing. I dialed the number and she picked up instantly.

"Hello, Tanya."

"Carlisle! How are things?"

"Well…"

"Oh that's never a good sign. What happened?"

"Well, it's more of what's happening…in fact, it's even happening as we speak. We've been having bickering problems."

"Ahhh…well…that happens."

"Not everyday. I come home every night to see some kind of argument going on. We practically live in wonderland as Esme has gardened all around our house since she does it to deal with stress."

Tanya laughed vivaciously over the phone. "Carlisle…you always are good for a laugh."

"I'm glad I amuse you, Tanya, but do you have any advice for me?"

"Well, I don't really have this in the extreme that you seem to and I assume talking doesn't work. However, we just had a nomad group pass through. Their dynamic was fantastic. I asked them their secret as they said they were relatively new vampires and they mentioned going to a vampire psychologist. I was intrigued so I asked some more and they mentioned that he had a special gift but he didn't say what it was. They said it made their time together wonderful and they got along extremely well."

"Did you get the therapist's name?"

"Hector Baker…and…yes, I have a phone number too."

She read it off and I thanked her. I said goodbye to Tanya and hung up the phone. I didn't know if this would be a good idea. I decided to contemplate my options. I could continue to listen to the bickering and hope they fixed it themselves…fat chance of that one. The day that Jacob and Rosalie resolve their differences is the day that I will die of a heart attack. I seriously think that they found this a sport of some kind. My other option would be to just let it continue but my mental state might not take it. I suppose this is kind of my last resort of sorts. I should probably run this by Esme first. I know the kids aren't going to like it but if she's on my side then we might be able to convince them.

I left my office and headed to the garden, hoping this plan would fix the argument that was quickly escalating before we lost another china cabinet to their battles.

Esme Point of View

I heard Carlisle approaching so I pulled the ear buds out of my ears. I found that only gardening wasn't enough of an escape from the arguments in the house as I could still hear them. I quickly had music as my escape so I listened to music to attempt to drown out the kids in the living room.

I was greeted with a kiss from my fairly perfect husband and I smiled at him. "What can I do for you, dear?"

"I was talking to Tanya about our problem."

"Our problem?"

"Yes, the problem that is escalating in dimension in the living room as we speak."

"Oh, that problem…well, what did she say about it?"

"Well, she heard about a vampire psychologist that has some special gift that helps covens get along."

"Do you think this will work?"

"I have no idea. I mean it doesn't seem like we have any other choice. You are running out of room to garden and unless I want to have the entire house surrounded by flowers, I think we need to take some kind of action."

"I suppose you are right. Do you think they will go for this?"

Carlisle looked at me with disbelief on his face.

"I suppose you're right. This is going to be done through threats to take away what they like most if they are going to go along with this."

"I couldn't have put it better myself. Ready to go be the mean parents sending their kids into counseling?"

I smirked and laughed "Definitely."

We walked into the living room and Carlisle instantly spoke "that is enough."

He barely spoke above a normal speaking voice but the kids heard the tone in his voice and they instantly calmed down.

"Why must you all fight all the time like this? You might listen if Esme or I yell at you but 10 minutes later, you'll be fighting again. I don't want to segregate this family but if you all can't get along, I may not have a choice. In an attempt to save our family relations, Esme and I have made a decision that you all will be going along with."

Carlisle turned to me and I took that as my cue to proceed with the bad news.

"We have decided to take you all to see a psychologist."

The reactions around the table caused me to fight biting my lip. Edward cringed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Bella and Nessie looked nervous, Rose looked ready to kill someone, Jake was grinning like a madman, Alice was biting her lip in an attempt not to laugh at the vision she was having, Jasper was sending off frustration to the whole table and Emmett said "we have to see a shrink? Why?"

"Emmett, I have lost 3 china cabinets in the past month once your fights began to get physical. I don't like replacing things and I am sick of the arguing. You would think that we would have learned patience by now."

Edward spoke up from his corner, pinching the bridge of his nose so hard that I thought he might break it. He must have been trying to block out his siblings murderous thoughts that I could nearly feel. "What if we promise to stop fighting?"

I was about to give in upon hearing the plea in Edward's voice but Carlisle spoke before I could.

"Ha. If I thought it was that easy, I would've done this ages ago. I know you guys too well to think that you wouldn't get angry and fight again."

Edward sighed in defeat but Rose wasn't giving up yet. "I refuse to go."

"Then you will be cut off from everything. And Emmett will be staying with us."

"You can't keep Emmett from coming with me. I will leave; I'm sick of the dog anyway."

"Actually, 'the dog' will not be joining us as most vampires aren't fond of Jacob's kind."

Jacob grinned broadly and began to whisper in Nessie's ear.

Edward slammed his fists to the table and said "keep your inappropriate thoughts about my daughter to yourself you pup."

Bella looked as though she would be blushing if she could.

Alice looked up, "Dad, although I think this may be a good idea, the vision I just had gives me the idea that this might not be the best idea."

"Alice, all your credit cards will be cancelled within 30 seconds if you don't agree to go."

Her face fell instantly and she muttered to Jasper "don't laugh, you're coming too."

"I guess it's agreed. We'll all be going as a family." I smiled at the faces that were still glaring at Carlisle and I but I knew we won this fight. Carlisle left to make the phone call to the doctor and I went to go clean up after the fight…for hopefully the last time.

AN: If you enjoyed this, please review.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Welcome back! Here is the therapy chapter…hope you like it.**

Chapter Two – Therapy

Edward Point of View

I looked around the office that the receptionist had happily brought us into. I couldn't believe the things she was thinking. I mean, she works for a vampire despite being a human and she is attracted to everyone. She couldn't take her eyes off of any of us and I heard her murderous thoughts towards my wife in particular. Apparently the twenty-something student had nothing better to do than fantasize about married men. I chuckled as we entered and took in my surroundings.

The therapist was sitting calmly in his chair as we gathered onto the couches that were placed into a circle. I pulled Bella protectively towards me and Alice sat on my other side. I took a peek into her mind and saw my face grimacing. Knowing this could mean nothing good, I sat and waited for the doctor to start talking. As we all sat waiting, I heard a variety of thoughts coming into my mind as my siblings took in their surroundings. Rosalie was attempting to not kill herself and Emmett was thrilled to be there. Jasper was nervously keeping his emotions in line and Alice was redecorating his office in her mind. Esme and Carlisle were thinking positive thoughts as they waited for the doctor to begin.

Finally, he cleared his throat and said "Welcome, I am so glad you could come in. So I thought we could start by getting some things out into the air so I can understand precisely where the problems in this coven are."

I heard internal groans from most of my siblings as they translated what he said as basically "let's talk about our feelings." Esme quickly interjected before we could speak and said "doctor, we believe we are a family, not simply a coven if you don't mind."

"Of course, that is no problem at all. Not a very common thing among vampires but I can work with it. Who would like to start?"

Emmett immediately volunteered and said "you always fight with Rose and I because you are jealous of the incredible chemistry we have together and our incredible sex life."

Jasper instantly laughed and Alice giggled as well. Bella whispered "I think we have them beat" in my ear, low enough that I was the only one who could hear it. I chuckled softly to her and spoke. "Emmett, I think you are delusional. Most of the time we are running away from you if you and Rose are doing something."

"Well, that's the only problem I see."

"Emmett, are you dense? This family is just filled with issues." Rosalie burst out. I could hear her practically yelling before she made her outburst but it was different to actually hear it. "Edward is a control freak, Alice is too and she has serious addiction problems, Jasper is an emotional wreck, Bella thinks she's better than everyone because she's supposedly immune to everything, and Emmett you are just a little slow sometimes and we like to fight with others."

The doctor put up his hands to signal no one else to speak. "Well, thank you Rosalie for telling me about these problems. Let's go in order, Edward, why does your sister think you are a control freak?"

I slid down in my seat slightly, not exactly wanting to own up to everything I do. "I'm unsure doctor. I mean, I just feel protective of my family, especially Bella, my wife."

"That's reasonable. Rosalie? Why does this make him a control freak?"

"Bella, can I see your cell phone?"

Bella took the phone out and threw it to Rose, not realizing her plan and I was powerless to stop her as I didn't realize what was happening. Rose flipped open the phone and opened the recent calls. "Doctor, look here. Bella has called Edward's number 90% of the time on the phone and many of the calls were under 2 minutes long."

I attempted to defend myself, "I was just checking in!"

"Every hour on the hour, Edward? That's a little excessive. I noticed when Alice, Bella, and I went shopping one day."

"Edward, I think that this does border on excessive. You all are vampires and Bella is fairly indestructible as far as I have heard. I also heard she is a shield so I don't think that your concern is warranted. I understand you two began a relationship when she was a human but she can take care of herself now."

"Yes doctor." I muttered. Bella stroked my arm gently and I relaxed into her. She grabbed my arm a little bit tighter and I looked at her in concern. "Is something wrong Bella?"

"Just a little dizzy…nothing to worry about."

I looked towards the doctor who wrote something down on his notepad and continued to speak. "Alice, Rosalie mentioned you next, why are you a control freak and what is your addiction?"

"Well, doctor," Alice began to speak to him as though this should be completely obvious and normal for anyone, "I simply have a flair for fashion and when someone as lovely as Bella is dressing in such awful clothing, I simply must do something about it."

"Alice, you bought me bunches of clothes. If you didn't want me to wear t-shirts, why did you buy them?"

"Because I knew you'd sneak out and buy them yourself. I saw it. I just have to do something about it everytime you wear them. I mean, Bella, you look so much better in nice dresses and skirts and blouses, why don't you wear them? I know Edward agrees."

"Edward? Do you really think I don't look nice like this?"

"You always look beautiful, my Bella."

Alice humphed. " I assume my sister thinks my addiction is shopping. I don't really think I'm addicted though. It is more of a hobby or a pastime for me. I can't help it. I just see some of the cute stuff available and I know it would be perfect for me or one of my siblings. They always love the Christmas presents I buy them the most."

"Um, Alice?"

"Yes, Rose?"

"Do you remember when you got Emmett that bear caller?"

"Of course, he loved it! You see doctor, Emmett's favorite prey is grizzly bears so I just figured he might want something to get them to come to him easier with."

"Alice! Emmett used that thing nonstop for 3 months in the house. He also managed to adjust it so that it could break glass!"

"Oh…I forgot that part. But he did have fun..."

"You bet, Alice. That was the best present. Hey Rose, baby, do we still have that somewhere."

"No, I think I remember Esme destroying it after you destroyed china goblets that Carlisle's parents owned."

The doctor looked a little uncomfortable but recovered quickly. I could hear Esme murmuring in her mind about the things Emmett destroyed with that gift. "Well, moving on, Jasper, why are you an emotional wreck? Does it have something to do with your gift?"

I decided to speak up before Jasper could. "Doctor, Jasper here likes to use his powers for evil at times. Often, when he and Alice are 'in the mood' so to speak, we get to feel the same way. Unfortunately, he also can control what he puts out so when he feels us starting to get close to our pinnacle, he will send us complete depression."

Emmett looked up at me. "Oh…so that's why that keeps happening. I wondered why Rose kept pushing me away…and I kept feeling like someone died."

Jasper spoke up, "Edward, it's not my fault you guys can't finish fast enough to keep up with us."

I heard the doctor cringe internally and Jasper seemed to smile more so he must have felt his embarrassment as well. The doctor turned to us and said "let's continue. I believe Bella, it was mentioned earlier that you were a shield, but you don't think you're better than everyone do you?"

My wife spoke timidly but sincerely to the doctor. "I really don't know what Rose means. I guess she might think that I hold myself up a little taller now that I have such a talent, but that may be because I acted so timidly when they first met me. I guess she is just unused to seeing me in such a light because of the past."

Rose seemed determined to throw everyone under the bus so she spoke fiercely to the doctor. "Doctor, she is constantly threatening us since she is the youngest and if we speak one thing bad, she might snap and attack us."

I hadn't seen that coming. I spoke up instantly, "Rose, Bella only did that a few times and it was when Emmett was making remarks about our sex life, despite her asking him not to."

I heard the doctor think in his head _"is this family obsessed with sex or what?"_ I stifled a chuckle and gently took Bella's hand in mine.

Emmett spoke up then and said "I couldn't help it, you guys just made it too easy. I just wanted to give everyone a laugh."

Bella and I growled at practically the same time and Rose said "see what I mean, doc? There she goes, threatening us again."

Carlisle and Esme had been rather silent this whole time and I heard Carlisle wondering if he should step in and stop it and Esme had resigned herself to let us all get ourselves into trouble.

The doctor signaled us to move on again and he said "Emmett, Rose said you were slow and liked to fight…tell me about that."

"Well doc, sometimes I don't get subtle well. Like for instance, when I'm out hunting, I just go for the prey, I don't stalk it like Eddy and Jasper here do. I just attack it cause I'm strong and can handle it. They must have to compensate for something I guess."

Jasper and I both growled at him and he continued "well, as you can see, I draw lots of anger towards me and I can't do anything about them provoking me. I'm not about to let them win, then my woman might think me less of a man…and I don't want her to have any doubts…"

The doctor looked surprised at his blatancy but he recovered quickly, "well that just leads us to Rose…would anyone like to tell me her problem?"

Alice spoke up first, "well she clearly likes to throw all of us under the bus so to speak and I think that shows deep seeded jealousy. Also, she has an obsession with cars that is unhealthy in my opinion."

Rose grimaced and spoke rapidly. "I just have a good idea of how people are flawed, Alice. I don't like to think of people as perfect. I'm not jealous of everyone; I just want to have them all know what I think about them. And I like cars…that's not a bad thing…"

I spoke up "no, but having sex with one is a little much."

Rose growled at me "I didn't have sex with your car, Edward. Emmett just pressed me up against it and I may have accidentally dented it."

The doctor's thoughts entered my head again and I heard him think "_yes, they are completely obsessed with sex in this family._"

"Anyway, Carlisle and Esme, is there anything you have to discuss?"

Carlisle spoke, "we are just concerned for our kids is all. I know I work a little too hard but I think Esme and I have a good relationship nonetheless."

Esme smiled and said "I know that I can be a bit of a mom sometimes to the kids but I don't think that's a bad thing. I just want to keep them under control well enough to keep the house in one piece."

The doctor thought something that confused me but I felt that he was blocking some of his thoughts, which I didn't even know was possible. He thought _"well, I know where to start now."_

A bell rang and the doctor said "unfortunately, that is all the time we have for today. I will have you all back in two weeks to discuss some more, but until then, just work on creating a more bonded family unit. I hope you have a nice two weeks."

We left and I got into a car with Carlisle, Esme and Bella. Esme seemed to be thinking about buying some stuff for Carlisle's car and his wardrobe which I thought was weird. I figured she must be in a redecorating kick again and I brushed my hand against Bella who had laid against my shoulder.

**AN: I hope it was funny. If not, I promise it is going to get a LOT better. I can't wait to write what happens next. **


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Welcome back! I own nothing of the Twilight series. Here it starts to get a little bit more fun…**

Chapter 3 – Alone Time

Carlisle's Point of View

We pulled into the house with the rest of the family behind us and I led us into the living room. I spoke to the kids before they could run away. "Try to get along this week, please. I recommend we all hang out with our spouses though until we calm down after what was said today."

I took Esme's hand and I led her to our room. She walked straight to the closet and started moving hangers around.

"Esme?"

"What dear?"

"What are you doing?"

"Organizing our closet."

"Can't that wait?"

"Not really. Our closet seems to be a disaster area. Also, I need some more clothes. I also see an awful lot of things that we are lacking in the room."

"What is going on?"

"Nothing, dear. I just wanted to organize. I'm sure you can understand."

I walked out to the living room and sat on the couch and looked around the room, confused at Esme's behavior.

Emmett's Point of View

I followed dad's advice and Rose and I went to the bedroom. I laid down across the bed and she went straight to the closet. She took off the tight skirt and low-cut shirt she was wearing. I figured she was putting on a sexier little number to let me take off, but she put on a turtleneck and slacks.

"Um, Rose, baby? Is something wrong?"

"No Em, I'm fine." She came and laid next to me. "Is there anything you want to talk about? Carlisle said we might be angry about stuff. I said some pretty mean stuff, did I offend you?"

"No, baby…what do you want to do?"

"You want to go work on your car some more? You got that new part in didn't you?"

"Emmett…let's just lay here and cuddle."

I froze and stood up off the bed. Rose never wanted to just cuddle. Not until we'd had sex at least 3 times in a night. I didn't know what was wrong with her but I walked out of our room and started pacing around the house, confused.

Edward Point of View

I was surprised when Bella led us back to the garage after Carlisle dismissed us. She walked up to my car and got in the back seat. I was confused but I followed her in, thinking she might not want to be overheard by our family.

"Bella, love, are you ok? Rose said some pretty mean things to you."

She pressed her lips to mine eagerly and I kissed her back, glad she seemed no worse for wear. I kissed her and she began to get more forceful, something that never happened. I pulled away from her and sat back.

"Bella, really, are you feeling ok?"

"Edward, I'm fine…can't you just relax and get to it?"

"This isn't like you Bella, what's wrong?"

"Can't you handle me being a little more forceful for once?"

She began kissing me again and she slid her hand down to my length, hidden behind my pants and gripped it strongly. She then reached up and began to rip her shirt off of her body. I pulled away and left the car, heading for the living room. Bella looked stunned as I shut the car door on her and I felt regret but mainly confusion. When I made it to the living room, I saw Carlisle sitting there as well and I stood by the window, looking confusedly outside.

Jasper Point of View

Alice went straight to the closet when we entered our room. This wasn't unusual as she was well known for changing repeatedly during the day. I think her record was 15 outfits in one day, although she has changed more times, it didn't count because she had to wear the outfit for a set period of time.

Once she had taken her clothes off, I walked up and put my arms around her waist. I began to kiss her and I instantly noticed that the kiss was reserved towards me. She was sending me huge amounts of embarrassment emotionally.

I broke the kiss and spoke to her, "Alice, are you okay?"

"I just want to put some clothes on okay Jazz?"

I leaned close to her and whispered in her ear, "but what I want to do with you doesn't require any clothes…"

"So are we taking a bubble bath?"

I was taken aback by her question but realized that what I was planning could work just as well in a bathtub, especially one of our size. "Sure, Alice, let's take a bath."

"Oh…not together. I was going to take one. You can wait out here."

"Alice, I don't want to be away from you. I want to spend much time with this fine specimen of a woman right here." I said lapsing into my southern accent by the end.

Alice stammered and I felt more embarrassment come my way. Normally, Alice went straight for the bed when I talked southern to her. I was completely baffled with her and I sat down as she looked through her closet. Finally finding what she was looking for, she threw it on and I froze when she entered the room.

"Alice…you are wearing my jeans and my t-shirt. What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong, Jazz. It's just so comfy."

I took off downstairs and found Carlisle and Edward in the living room.

"Alice is wearing jeans and a t-shirt…what the hell is going on?"

**AN: ok…I love that last line. If you do too, can you drop me a review? :) – Sorry it's short but it was a good stopping point.**


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: I hope you like this. It's going to get a little confusing here. But one non-confusing part is that I do not own Twilight.**

Chapter Four– What Happened?

Carlisle Point of View

"Alright guys, let's just calm down. Emmett! Can you come here?"

Emmett flew down the stairs. "Hey guys, what's wrong with you?"

Jasper spoke, "Alice came out wearing jeans and a t-shirt."

"Whoa, what the-?"

Edward spoke, "I know, right."

I said, "guys, let's just talk this out. Honestly, Esme was acting a little like Alice and it seems as though Alice was acting like Bella from that description."

Jasper said, "well that would make sense as I noticed that there was a large amount of embarrassment radiating from her."

Edward spoke, "Bella basically attacked me in the car so I think that she must be Rosalie."

Emmett said, "I guess that makes Rose some form of Esme. She did dress in a more Esme like outfit."

I was very confused at this point and it takes a lot to have that happen. "How did this happen?"

Emmett spoke up, "Well, maybe the girls are playing a trick on us."

Jasper muttered "pretty cruel trick."

Edward then replied, "no, Bella looked hurt when I left her in the car. I can tell she wasn't expecting it. I don't think it's a trick."

"Then what is it, man?" Emmett demanded after seeing his idea shot down.

I said "Maybe it's a special talent the doctor had…maybe this is what Tanya meant…"

Edward turned to me and said, "what talent are we talking about here?"

I shook my head, "I don't know. I mean, Tanya didn't know, she said it was something special though. Why would he change our wives personalities around?"

Nessie and Jacob walked into the room at that point and instantly froze.

Jake spoke first, "Who has changed personalities?"

"The girls, Esme, Rose, Bella, and Alice."

Nessie and Jake looked at each other and smiled before bursting into laughter.

Emmett, Edward, and Jasper growled at them and they shut up instantly. I managed to restrain myself from growling only barely. I was so frustrated and confused. What would this lead to?

"Ness, Jake, you are going to help us with this. You are going to Tanya and then to track down this other coven to get more information so that we have a shot of knowing what we are up against."

"Alright, grampa!" Nessie kissed my cheek and then took Jake by the hand. I saw Edward cringe at the idea of his daughter going off with Jake for an extended period and I put my hand on his shoulder before he could speak.

"Edward, they might be our only shot…"

"I know, but if he lays a hand on her…"

"You'll know she's in good hands."

He grimaced but resigned himself to the fate. Emmett looked at me and said "this is great that we might eventually get answers but what do we do in the meantime?"

I looked at my sons, all in different forms of angst over their wives personalities being switched around so dramatically. I thought about how Esme was acting back in our bedroom right now and I didn't know how I was going to handle it until we got more answers. I thought about just calling the doctor but I decided that he probably did this for a reason and it was to help us get along better.

"Guys, the doctor must have had a good reason for doing this. He wouldn't just switch us all up for nothing. We have all been around for at least 100 years; we can handle this. Besides, perhaps getting to know each other better will help general relationships. So go back to your wives and get to know them better…"

Emmett replied, "which wives? The ones that look like who we married or the ones that act like who we married."

I froze, not really knowing how to answer. I supposed that we were supposed to see them in a different personality so we can better understand the person behind the personality.

"I guess the ones that look like who we married."

The boys all sighed and left the living room, heading for their wives. I groaned as I went back to Esme, not really knowing what to expect…when I entered my office I saw her on my computer, clicking faster than I had ever seen anyone click on the computer before and talking rapidly into a phone.

I sighed and walked over, not sure that seeing a therapist was the best idea after all.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: As a reminder, Bella has Rose's personality, Alice has Bella's, Rose has Esme's, and Esme has Alice's.**

**Edward POV**

I left the living room to see Bella standing there. She wrapped her arms around me and I sighed in feeling her body against mine. I brushed my hand against her hair and I sighed.

"What would you like to do Bella?"

"Would you play for me?"

I nodded in surprise. I figured that with Rose inside of her, she wouldn't want to hear me play as Rose never did. She always thought I was showing off. I walked over to the piano nonetheless and Bella sat next to me. I lightly tapped the middle C, instantly knowing it was in perfect tune, like normal. My fingers danced across the keys and Bella moved her head to the music. Ever since she was changed, she liked to watch me play, now that she could actually follow my fingers. In fact, I would play the fastest pieces I knew just so that she would be challenged to see my fingers flying across the keys. I decided to start mellow though so I played Esme's favorite and then transitioned into her lullaby.

"Silly Edward, I don't need a lullaby anymore, I can't sleep." Bella said playfully.

I grinned and sped up the song, transitioning into another one of my favorite pieces. I began flying across the keys and I watched Bella's eyes dart across the keys trying to keep up with my flashing fingers. Suddenly, I felt a slap on my shoulder.

"Edward, stop showing off."

I instantly knew that Rose was taking back over Bella's personality. I also knew better than to reason with Rose so I stopped playing. A very odd mix of expressions passed over her face and the next thing I knew, Bella was screaming as she ran out of the house. I followed her and tried to stop her. She was too fast so I ended up sitting outside at the edge of the forest.

I sat listening to Bella get further and further away from me. Initially I figured that I could handle Rose looking like Bella and being with me, but now I wasn't so sure. I looked towards the trees and peeled a piece of bark off the tree before beginning to break it into small pieces, focusing on the mundane activity in front of me to take my mind off of the confusion that was my current relationship.

EmPOV

I walked with Rose back to the bedroom, when we arrived she instantly began redecorating. She took out a piece of paper and started planning for our new spectacular bedroom. I was just as excited about it as she was, but at the same time I didn't like where this was going. I could tell that she was going to throw out all of my favorite things.

"Emmett, how do you feel about rose wallpaper? I mean it would match my name and all."

I groaned and dragged her away from the desk. I pulled her to the bed and I tried to kiss her but she kept squirming away from me. I ran my hands along her body like I know she likes but she simply ignored me and continued trying to get away. I didn't know how I was supposed to handle this. I was not going to live the rest of my life as a monk because my new wife doesn't want sex. I tried to pin her down when I heard.

"Emmett McCarty Cullen! Stop it this instant!"

I moved off of her and sat cross-legged on the bed. She laid her head in my lap and started muttering to me.

"That was completely uncalled for, Emmett. You need to show a woman respect, not treat her like a ragdoll; that can be used over and over again. I deserve more respect than that and I expect you to give it to me. We will be married for eternity and I am not going to live eternity with a chauvinist."

I tried really hard to not roll my eyes at my wife acting like my mom. It took a bit of effort but I calmed down and focused on Rose being in my lap. I ran my hands along her back, massaging her gently. She then started to rub my leg, in a comforting, not stimulating fashion. I froze and immediately stood up, knocking her to the side.

I took off down the stairs. I knew that this would be entirely awkward by having my mother become my wife, but I didn't think it would be like this. I was not going to get lectured for my sexual prowess. I walked to the TV and turned on the XBOX, put in Halo, and prepared to destroy whoever crossed my path.

JPOV

I actually was pretty ok with this situation. If Alice was acting like Bella, I wouldn't have to take her shopping anymore, I wouldn't have to get dressed up by her anymore. This was pretty good. I wanted to make sure though so I sat down with her to talk.

"Alice? Do you want to go shopping?"

"No, Jaz."

"How about giving me a makeover? Or maybe Bella, do you want to do a makeover?"

"Of course not, Jaz." She looked at me strangely but I smiled nonetheless. All the sex and none of the pain, this could be pretty great. I moved to her and kissed her passionately. She kissed me back before freezing underneath my body. I knew she was getting a vision so I moved to her neck and kept kissing her there.

She blinked and sat up abruptly. She had a look of fear in her eyes and I felt fear radiating off of her.

"Alice, honey, what's wrong, what did you see?"

She shook her head and ran to the corner of the room before curling into a ball and sitting there. "Stay away from me."

"Alice, I won't hurt you. What did you see?"

She flooded the room with embarrassment and I began to realize what she saw.

"I don't want to have sex with you."

"Alice, we do this all the time…"

"Jaz, we're in the middle of the family room."

I moved to her and muttered "never stopped you before."

"Jasper, stay away from me. I don't want this. I want Edward."

I froze in place, remembering that Bella was in control of Alice's personality so this was to be expected. I thought about trying harder to get her out of the corner but I decided against it.

I walked over to the TV to find Emmett there. I picked up a controller and joined him in kicking people's asses on the game.

CPOV

I followed Esme to my office. I figured that I would be able to handle this better than the boys and I would be able to prove to them that this would work. I had no idea just how wrong I would be.

I turned around once I entered my office to see Esme typing furiously on the computer, flipping pages in catalogs and talking rapidly on the phone. It didn't take long for me to realize that she was ordering stuff.

"Esme, dear, what are you ordering?"

"Hold on. I am ordering the stuff for your new wardrobe, my new wardrobe, and some stuff for the rest of us as well."

"Why are you doing it now?"

"When else would I do it? Your wardrobe is lacking, dear."

I walked to the computer and phone and pulled the cords on both of them, causing Esme to jump up and scream at me. She then caught sight of herself in a mirror and screamed again. I followed her to our bedroom to find her naked in the process of changing. I stepped up to her and pulled her close.

She squealed loudly as I gripped her body tightly to mine and said "Dad!"

I figured she wanted to roleplay with me, like we had before so I started muttering about all the naughty things her daddy wanted to do with her and she hit me hard.

"Esme, honey, I think you need to see a doctor…let me be your doctor."

"Dad! I am fine! I am a vampire and naked, let me put clothes on. Gosh."

I left the room as she changed and I noticed that Emmett and Jasper were playing Halo rather ruthlessly but I kept walking until I got to the edge of the forest where Edward was sitting, surrounded by toothpicks.

"I think all the guys need to talk again, huh?"

"Yes, I think that would be a good idea."

**AN: What will happen next?**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Welcome back!**

Chapter Eleven – Guy Talk

Carlisle POV

Edward and I walked into the house and met with the guys who were in the living room. I walked in and they surprisingly stopped playing relatively quickly and gave me their attention.

"So, I guess we all couldn't really handle it."

There were murmurs from the other guys in agreement and I looked around before continuing. "We can't just give up though and try to deal. We are immortal. We aren't going to die so we need to fix this."

Edward looked at me with concern in his eyes.

"I know it won't be easy, but I think we might be able to fix it if we try to appeal to the new girl's nature."

Emmett finally spoke and said "What do you mean dad?"

"I mean you are going to do what Esme likes, Edward is gonna do what Rose likes and so on."

The guys nodded and we split off to see if this plan would work.

Edward POV

I took Bella (or at least the girl who looked like her) to the garage and let her play with my car. It was kind of sexy to see Bella working on my car. We talked about the car and she started fiddling with it as I watched. Suddenly Alice appeared next to me and looked shyly at me.

"What's up Alice?" I asked.

"Will you come play for me, Edward?"

"What? You mean my piano?"

"Of course!"

"Bella, do you mind?"

"Huh? What? Oh no, Edward it's fine, go ahead."

I walked to the living room and began to play my piano again for that day. Alice sang along with me and clapped at the end of the song. The next thing I knew, she was kissing me. I initially froze but I recognized that it felt like Bella was the one kissing me. I was surprised but I kissed her back and felt wonderful to be kissing my Bella again. At least until I opened my eyes and saw Alice looking at me. She walked off after kissing my cheek.

Bella walked in and I instantly felt guilty. She had grease on her face from playing with my car.

"Hey, Edward. I am going to go wash off and then order some new parts for the Volvo."

She gave me a rough kiss on the lips, which smeared grease on my cheek and I grimaced as she left. I hated getting this stuff on me. Rose liked to tease me with it when she would get greasy. I walked off to one of our many bathrooms (which were mainly used for sex) to clean myself off, grumbling to myself at the ridiculousness of the situation we were in.

EmPOV

Bella walked into our room covered in grease, where I was trying to think of a way to get to know Rose better…well at least this new mom-like Rose, and I groaned. She grinned at me in a very non-Bella way, actually in a very Rosalie way, before beckoning me with her finger to join her. She walked toward the shower and began taking off the jacket she was wearing. I immediately stood up and joined her, stripping off my clothes along the way.

I grabbed her shoulders roughly in the warm water and pressed her to the wall. She let out a groan and I started kissing her. She moaned in delight and I chuckled softly as I used my hands to explore her body. I groaned as I felt her naked breasts and ass and said "god, Rose, you're perfect…" Suddenly, she froze underneath of me and I opened my eyes. I had forgotten that I was actually kissing Bella. I guess technically, although this whole switch has really screwed up my mind. Bella ran out of the shower and grabbed a towel. I walked back into the bedroom that Rose and I share to find her cleaning. I walked over to her with a towel slung low around my waist and kissed her. It was nothing like the kiss I had just shared with Bella. Rose's kiss was sentimental and soft, whereas Bella's was brimming with passion and lust. I walked back to the bathroom and turned the shower back on and sat in it, thinking in utter confusion as to what was going to happen.

Jasper POV

I had found Alice in our room. As I walked in, I approached her slowly, like she was a poisonous animal. I sent all the calmness I had in my body towards her and saw her relax. I sat down next to her in the corner and placed my arm around her. I didn't really know what Carlisle expected me to do. Bella doesn't do anything except spend time with Edward and Nessie. Nessie wasn't here and I wasn't about to let Alice go with Edward. I decided instead to use my ability in a way that no one else could. I started to play with the emotions in the room to get her to respond in the way that the Alice I knew and loved would.

It hadn't been more than 5 minutes of this exercise and I was already exhausted. I felt like jumping up and down with how much enthusiasm I was trying to pour into her and that just wasn't going to work for me. I groaned and sighed seeing as how I also had managed to get Alice into tears in the corner of the room. I sighed and left to go sit in the hall to let her calm down. Esme came prancing up to me at this point and it was like a taller version of Alice walking up. I felt the exuberance coming from her and gladly kissed her. I felt Alice's kiss in my body and sighed in love. I opened my eyes to see Esme's face and suddenly came to my senses. I was kissing my mom…I was thinking about having sex with MY MOM! I ran out of the house before I could lose control again and promptly climbed up a tree, hoping that I would be safe here.

Carlisle POV

_Alright_, I thought to myself, _I have had 350 years of practice with patience…I'm sure I can handle a change in my wife's personality…or at least handle it better than my sons._

I walked into my office and found her there…practically bouncing in her seat. I was used to Alice bouncing around after all these years bit to see Esme do it was something else. I shook my head at her and I sat next to her to see what she was so excited about.

"Carlisle! I found the coolest thing online!"

"What is it dear?" I said with a patience that I wasn't even aware I possessed.

"Well, I found a tracker that tells me about every single shoe released every day and I had them all forwarded to the e-mail! Also, I found a neat little piece of hardware that I can take some of your hair and put it in and track you wherever you are! Isn't that exciting?"

I looked at her enthusiasm with sheer terror filling my body. I couldn't believe that she would seriously consider tracking me. I mean, sure I work long hours but I come home to her. I would never dream of cheating on her…I didn't think that Alice had a tracker running on Jasper but maybe I should check on that, just to be safe. I decided I should try to fix this.

Know I was treading in dangerous waters I said, "Esme, dear, why do you want to track me?"

"Well, I know you work long hours as a very important surgeon but I really just want to know where you buy my presents. I'm not Alice, I can't be clairvoyant and I have to wait to be surprised. That won't do…I like to know and that way, if you go to a forbidden store (she glowered angrily at me at this point), I will know to send Emmett after you!"

The forbidden store that she mentioned was Wal-mart. I only knew this because Alice flipped out when I bought a lamp there once and she proceeded to destroy it…and about three tables, a window, and a wall in the process when she saw the "cheap knock-off" in our living room.

I looked at Esme and realized that I could reason with her all I wanted but it wasn't going to be enough for me to deal with and this wasn't getting any easier. I left the room and nearly crashed into Rose.

Rose looked at me and smiled gently, a totally foreign look on her normally malicious or lust-driven face. I half-smiled back and she took my hand.

"What's wrong?"

I started talking with her and she was completely understanding and kind towards me. When I finished speaking, she leaned close to me and kissed me softly. I ran my fingers along the body I was kissing and froze. This wasn't Esme…it might feel like her kiss but it wasn't her. I pulled myself away from her and stepped back into my office. I got Esme out of there and then sat down to put a call into this therapist.

**AN: hope you guys are liking this!**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven – Calling in the Reinforcements

Carlisle POV

I knew it was a weekend and I knew that we had a therapy session scheduled for the next week but I couldn't wait any longer to deal with this. I was sure my sons were having the same number if not more problems than me and I wanted to get this fixed and fast. The therapist had seemed like a reasonable man before so I figured that he would at least tell me the key to fixing all this. Or at least I hoped he would.

His secretary answered the phone and I asked politely to speak to the doctor.

He answered the phone and said "ah, Carlisle, can't say I'm surprised to hear from you."

"So, you know why I'm calling?"

"Every single time I use this particular method of therapy, I generally get a phone call within the next 24 hours."

"So, can you get rid of this therapy? I mean I'm sure that my family would be willing to try anything as long as we got our normal wives back."

"No. Carlisle, in my years of practice, I have learned how effective this is, especially in covens of this size. You guys need to figure out the key to reversing it on your own…the other covens have managed it before you, and you guys seem pretty smart."

"The wrong wives are throwing themselves at the wrong husbands because of this personality switcheroo…I want this fixed."

The doctor said "really? That's a new reaction…it normally isn't this extreme…of course not many vampires are married so I haven't really tried this on married couples before…but…"

I sensed an opening and went for it when I said, "So you'll switch them back?"

"Of course not."

"Why not?"

"You need to figure it out on your own. I have faith in you and your family Carlisle. Try something else…it's only been less than 12 hours since this started taking control…you haven't exhausted all your options yet, I'm sure of that."

I sighed as I said good bye to him. I called Jake's cell phone and said "tell me you have some good news."

Jake chuckled heartily and said "it's that bad there huh?"

"I just kissed Rosalie."

Jake abruptly stopped laughing and said "wow, it really is bad…unfortunately, I don't know if this lead is going to pan out, but we are getting close to someone who might have some more answers for us. Nessie and I are moving as fast as we can."

"Call me the second you find something out from this someone ok?"

"Absolutely Gramps!"

I smiled at Jake calling me Gramps, and suddenly my door burst open to show my three sons looking very angry.

"Hey, I was just about to call you all in."

"The old plan didn't work Carlisle." Edward stated seriously.

"I'm aware of that Edward, I have a new idea, remember when you asked if we were going with the women who looked like or acted like our wives?"

The guys all nodded, trying to figure out where I was going with this.

"Well, let's go with the ones who act like our wives and see if that fixes things. The doctor must have done this for a reason."

We all got up and hoped that this would work as we left my office to hopefully go find our new wives.

**AN: Sorry it's so short…reviews are very welcomed! Please review! This was a transition chapter…the next one will have the four points of view again for all of the guys.**


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight – A New Look

Edward POV

I walked up to Jasper and Alice's bedroom and found Alice hiding in the corner. Seeing my usually very enthusiastic sister in the corner was quite surprising but I handled it alright. I offered her my hand and led her to my room. Despite Esme giving us a cottage, I still had a bedroom in the main house which was useful at times. I instantly realized a shocking fact. Bella's thoughts weren't shielded from me in Alice's body. I was suddenly very interested.

"Should I call you Alice or Bella?" I asked the girl who looked like my sister but thought like my wife.

"Alice…" she said softly.

"Alice, this is neat. I missed you…I like your shyness and I am glad to be around you again…I really liked that kiss earlier today…"

Alice smiled and thought _I liked it too…_

I leaned down to kiss her and I saw her get a vision of us together. I had seen Alice's visions of Bella's and my sexual escapades before but realizing that this was us was quite another thing. I actually kind of liked it. I kissed her and savored every thought that was going through her head. I couldn't believe that I was hearing Bella's thoughts! I mean she had been practicing letting her shield down for me but to hear them constantly was exhilarating. I was getting very into experiencing my new wife when a scent hit me.

Bella (the one who looked like my brown-eyed beauty) walked by the bedroom and I smelled her very characteristic scent. I instantly felt a reaction in my groin and I knew that the positives of this new look and for that matter scent, weren't going to work out. I pulled away from Alice and left the room, heading for my father, wondering what plan we would have to come up with this time.

Emmett POV

I had gone an entire twelve hours without having sex…not for lack of trying. Now with this new plan, I knew what my goal was. I was going to have sex with my Rose, no matter how awkward it was.

I pulled Bella gleefully to the bedroom and started heavily making out with her. It felt identical to Rose when I had my eyes closed and I kissed her, but once she moaned, I knew it wasn't her and I instantly felt awful for wanting to have sex with my little sister.

I pulled away from Bella and said "I can't do this…I can't take clothes off of my little sister."

She purred in a way that clearly showed she was the furthest thing from Bella that existed and said "then let's blindfold you and you won't be able to see me."

I agreed instantly and felt her lower herself onto my very ready body and I groaned in delight. Unfortunately, Bella did too and it wasn't Rose's voice. I knew that I was being silly but I couldn't do it, blindfold or not. I left Bella in the room and headed for Carlisle, praying her had a plan to fix this madness.

Jasper POV

I was hit by a wave of enthusiasm coming off of Esme. _There's my wife that I know and love._ I thought happily to myself. I approached her and she smiled. She kissed me jubilantly and I pulled her close, missing the intimacy that I had come to depend on with her. Our love actually managed to balance me out. The love she always gave off for me was helpful to keeping me grounded so I instantly felt safe by just being close to my angel.

I pulled her to our bed and started kissing down her body. I tickled her a little bit, knowing that I would be rewarded with her musical laugh and froze when she did laugh. It wasn't her. I knew Alice's laugh and her scent and although her love was very prevalent, I wasn't getting the full experience. I looked at the eyes that were staring at me in confusion. We all had the same eyes but it just wasn't the same. I knew Alice's face and Esme's features weren't it. I apologized and left the room, knowing that this, although it started a lot better than before, wasn't going to fix it.

Carlisle POV

I walked into our bedroom to find Rose waiting for me. She walked up and pulled me close by the neck of my collar. I gave in as I felt Esme's kiss. I tried to ignore the body that was giving it to me, knowing that Esme, not Rose was behind it. I kissed her back and she knew that I was ready to take it further. I felt her rapidly divest us our clothes as we laid down together. I opened my eyes, expecting to see my lovely wife but forgetting just who I was with.

I knew Rose was nice looking, I mean I had been the one to change her, but to me, she didn't hold a candle to Esme and all her kindness and generosity. I couldn't think of Rose as anything other than my daughter and this wasn't going to work. I couldn't just close my eyes and run my hands along her body without feeling like a criminal of pedophilia, although my daughter was far above the legal age.

I felt awful leaving Rose like that, knowing that she was doing what she knew I liked, but this wasn't working and I knew that this was not what the doctor had meant. I figured it was time for another round of guy talk because I knew that if I had problems, then so did they.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine – A lead

Carlisle POV

My sons and I were gathered in my office again and I had my head in my hands.

Emmett spoke first "Well, dad? What's our next plan?"

"I don't know. I don't know why we can't get over such simple little things that normally don't bug us at all."

Jasper responded and said "I've got nothing. Unless we can force this guy with violence to fix this, I don't see anything that's going to do us any good."

Edward said "call the therapist again. Explain everything to him that we've tried and what went wrong. Maybe we can all team up against him and get him to change his mind."

The other two nodded and I dialed his number again. I spent the next hour explaining everything that had happened, with added input from my sons as help. By the end the doctor just sounded frustrated.

"Carlisle, you guys aren't realizing why I did this. This isn't the key. Stop focusing on getting back what you lost. Take advantage of the new."

"We tried both varieties of that and it didn't work."

"That's not it. Carlisle, I told you. You have a smart, strong family. I'm sure that you'll figure this out."

He hung up and I sighed. My three sons looked like they were about to go see the doctor and tear him to pieces and light him on fire. I was ready to join them when the phone rang.

A friendly voice coming from the speakerphone filled the room. "Hey Carlisle!"

"Jake, you're on speakerphone with everyone. Please tell us you found something out."

"Well, the guy we were with was rather unwilling to talk…something about a confidentiality agreement…we got one thing out of him though."

"What? Anything might help Jake."

"Well apparently the personalities got switched to these people for a specific reason. That was all that I could find out."

"So Rose was put in Bella's body for a specific reason?"

"Yes."

"ok, thanks Jake, you guys can head back I guess, if you have no more leads."

"Alright." He said before hanging up.

I looked at my sons who all looked confused.

Emmett spoke first again, "so if this is based around the girls, why don't we just lock them all in a room together and let them fight it out until they fix this?"

I chuckled inwardly at this idea but knew that it wouldn't be the key.

"No, that would only succeed in destroying that room or more of the house."

The guys smiled at the idea of a girl fight and I figured I ought to remind them about something else. "Which you know Esme would make all of you guys fix."

Their smiles faded instantly and they sighed.

Edward said "well, let's just talk it out with everyone. There must be issues with each person who got switched to whom. We can all just sit and talk it out."

It was a last ditch effort kind of plan but I nodded and we headed out to find the girls and bring them down to the living room where we could all sit and talk together.

**AN: Only two chapters left! Please review!**


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: when a person speaks in this chapter, I am referring to who they look like! I know this is super confusing but I hope it's funny for all of you.**

Chapter Ten – Final Showdown

Emmett POV

We were all sitting in the living room with the guys on one side and the girls on the other. I felt like this was going to be a bad episode of Jerry Springer or something. I chuckled thinking of how funny it would be for us to go on that show. I wished that I had told Carlisle that we should do that.

Carlisle stood up and spoke "we need to fix this."

The girls looked at each other and kind of nodded. Esme spoke and said "if I was still me, maybe I could have a vision of how to fix this," she said shooting a look at Alice.

Alice spoke up and said "I don't know how to control them! I keep getting all these sexually perverted fantasies coming up and I don't even know what's going on half the time. I am learning way too much about you guys, and besides, I miss my shield!"

Bella looked up and said "hey, I've finally got a power, although I would trade it back in an instant to be pretty again."

Rose looked up and said "I hate these nails…I broke 5 of them when I was gardening earlier."

Bella stood up with wide eyes. I knew how Rose was about her nails. I was about to see Bella fly off the handle. I was suddenly very glad that we hadn't locked the girls in a room because then I wouldn't have had a front row seat for this entertainment.

"You did what to my nails? I am so careful with those! They take forever to grow. How could you!" She then lunged at Rose and Carlisle moved quickly. He stepped between them and I felt a wave of calm go through the room. I glanced at Jasper with a pout on my face. He shrugged and I grimaced.

Carlisle spoke up with a loud voice. "Ladies, we are not animals, we are going to talk this out like rational adults. Most of you have been alive for at least a century; you should have learned to behave yourselves better than this."

The girls looked down instantly after Carlisle reprimanded them. He spoke again "let's start with the two of you who nearly exploded."

Rose and Bella looked at each other with daggers shooting out of their eyes. Before they could open their mouths to speak, Carlisle took control. "Rose, I know you didn't mean to break the nails right?"

She nodded her head. "Exactly, so I think that Bella can forgive you for that, right?"

Bella rolled her eyes and slowly nodded her head.

"Good. Now, Rose, there must be a reason that Esme was put inside your body."

"Well, I don't know what it is."

"Well, Esme, do you know why you might have an issue with Rose?"

Edward spoke up, "Esme always thinks that Rose starts the fights…or at least starts a lot of them."

Carlisle nodded to Edward. "Esme, I think we all need to take equal blame for the fights starting."

Rose nodded her head and sat quietly before saying "I'm sorry for blaming anyone in particular."

Everyone in the room said that it was alright and Carlisle continued our little intervention session.

"Bella and Rose, what issues are you still harboring towards each other? I thought this all got worked out ages ago when Bella had Nessie."

Bella's body spoke with Rose's arrogant tone. "It still is that she _had_ Nessie. I didn't get that opportunity. I would give anything to have a child, not be the aunt of her."

Alice's body timidly spoke, "I think of you as her mother too you know Rose. I thought we were past this too."

"Well, you also got this incredible power when you were changed and I just have my vanity and beauty."

I spoke up now and said "Rose baby, you don't need any more than that. I love your body and to know that we get to enjoy each other for every second of eternity and make each other-"

I was abruptly cut off by Carlisle who said "I think she gets the picture."

Bella's face lit up with a smile and she said in an incredibly sultry and sexy voice "When I get back inside the proper body, you will be proving that to me, baby."

I grinned, glad I helped with this.

Carlisle groaned and turned to Alice. "Bella, what possible problem do you have with Alice? You two have always basically been sisters."

Alice's face contorted as she avoided looking at Esme. "Well, she can see things and that's kind of weird and all, and Edward can hear her thoughts so sometimes I think he likes her more than me."

Edward's face contorted as he realized this. He raced over to her and held her tight in her arms, murmuring to her. We couldn't hear what he was saying but Alice's face was slowly coming up with a smile as he spoke to her.

Jasper spoke up, "Alice might be able to see things Bella, but you are the one who saved us from the Volturi that one time."

She would be blushing if she was still human as she said "I know."

Carlisle smiled and said, "alright, Alice, what's wrong with you and Esme?"

Esme's face was suddenly wiped of all emotion and she spoke soft, low, and quickly, as though hoping we wouldn't hear. "She goes shopping without me…and she's always telling me to mellow out."

Rose looked concerned for the first time in her life and if I didn't know that Esme was inside of her, I would be seriously concerned. "Alice, honey, I just don't want you to break anything when you get super excited, like you do."

"And the shopping?" She whimpered softly.

"Well, sometimes I want to try to surprise someone in our family and if I make the decision without thought then it works a little better to surprise someone here…"

Esme's face perked up instantly and she started bouncing. Rose rolled her eyes and she genuinely smiled at Esme.

All four women looked at Carlisle expectantly and then they all suddenly clutched their heads, as if they were in pain. All of us guys stood up and walked towards them.

Rose stood up first and threw herself into my arms and started whispering what she wanted to do with me fervently. I lifted her up in the air and spun her in a circle, kissing her. Edward groaned as I nearly took Bella and him out but grinned.

We raced upstairs as the other couples reunited in joy. I heard Esme and Carlisle walk by a little bit later, before Rose very effectively returned my attentions back to her.

**AN: Well, they're all back. I hope you were able to keep track. There will be a short epilogue. Please review.**


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: Last chapter…BTW, I own nothing.**

Chapter 11 – Epilogue

Carlisle POV

We all entered the therapist's office the next week. It had been a rather quiet week for us, no fighting, nothing broken. We all sat down and waited for the doctor to address us.

"Well, since you aren't all screaming at each other, I take it you figured out how to fix everything."

I spoke up and said "yes, we talked it out and found out some interesting things about each other and I think things are a lot better now."

The doctor smiled and said "Aren't you glad I did this?"

The guys glared venomously at me as I said "Yes doctor, I am."

I shot them all looks that if they told the doctor what they thought, they'd be in deep trouble and I watched them all shrink back in their seats.

I smiled again as the doctor continued talking and explaining that they had to keep everything that happened here confidential. I was nodding my head patiently while I gently had my arm around Esme.

I was thinking about how I was glad that everything was out there in the air. All of us had seemed happier this week, even Edward hadn't been as rude to Jake about his "not-so-innocent intentions" with his daughter.

I was glad that we had come. I made a note to send Tanya a thank you note and I hoped that we would stay this way for a long time to come.

**AN: Well, I don't really like the epilogue but I felt it needed more closure. Please tell me what you thought about it! I mean in a review! :) Thanks for reading**

**Also, if you are looking for some great humor/romance Twilight fanfics, go check out whalestail (author name) fics. My favorites are Road Trip and baby oven. :)**


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